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spacer.gif   Erika Mikkalo
Posted by : cj on Friday, December 03, 2004 - 04:48 PM
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Poetry:  Click On The Author's Name Greasy Scars

I do it so it feels like hell.
I do it so it feels real.
I guess you could say I’ve a call.

-- Sylvia Plath
“Lady Lazarus”


That later, that smooth sigh, that sharp inhalation then the silver
stethoscope disk enlisted to amplify the echo inside. That detergent, that smiling
razor, that medicine cabinet mirror that is really a portal into an exquisitely
personal hell designed for your express torment by a battalion of fiendish
engineers. That incremental improvement
(the scale’s needle limps to the left and wavers), that finite marking
time, that butt-end of days (for you have known them
all). That elusive dream. Those alluded to, undreamt.
Those not permitted the infinite indulgence of a wish. Those
on the clock, in a line, at the Department,
awaiting the appropriate documentation. A Committee but not a
Commission. A man retrieving color-coded manila from an infinite olive drab
dented metal file cabinet. A highway overpass part of a cloverleaf
lucky four at the center pretzel fold one causes helicopter-broadcast
By offering to test gravity over the railing. This scrap of positive
speculation. This unfurled morning glory, heavenly blue; this garden slug, trod-upon.
This family. This circle that is a triangle, this set of points ground down.
This carcass called your darling. This number. This formula.
This solution. Dissolution. Salud.



Some Villain

Some villain broke it – the only toy that a little girl had. Some villain spilled battery acid on her mary janes. Some villain painted all the windowpanes mud brown and threw extra mites on the cockatiel. Some villain hid all the candy. Some villain put rusty razor blades in Halloween apples. Some villain was handing out Halloween apples instead of yellow orange white tipped candy corn in the first place. Some villain calculates how far he can push her. Some villain tells her nothing but lies. Some villain told her that she was pretty but wouldn’t touch her. Some villain said she was wearing lingerie the wrong way – it was not tied around her head, we assure you. Some villain left newspapers in piles around the house and used toilet paper to blow his nose instead of Kleenex™. Some villain decided to run away. Some villain emptied the bank account when he did. Some villain took the last five bucks out of her wallet to have coffee with another woman. Some villain tried to tell her how many times they’d kissed. Some villain wouldn’t get groceries. Some villain used a shovel to kill the litter of rat babies in the compost heap. Some villain had a left nut swollen up as big as a goose’s egg. Or was it his right? The right. Some villain wouldn’t go to a physician until she sent him. Some villain didn’t get blood work done despite promising. Some villain called from a starlit tropical beach to describe it to her, to say that he wanted her there instead of thousands and thousands miles away being alone. Some villain said that he could tell that she didn’t really want to be with anyone when she suggested that they keep doing their own laundry. Some villain got sick of sautéed zucchini in the spaghetti sauce but wouldn’t cook himself. Some villain didn’t get the stray cat fixed so she had another batch of kittens immediately. Some villain picked his molars with his fingernail. Some villain made perfunctory love on his wedding night, too fatigued to even be ritualistic, as basic as a sneeze. Some villain placed the side of his face on her shoulder and gazed up for her approval like a toddler. Some villain wore an absurd Chinese straw hat and nancy pink tank top in the garden. Some villain decorated the house with dumpster findings. Some villain made wine from brickdust. Some villain pulled out and walked away. Some villain wouldn’t hold her when she cried. She could cry a long time.

 
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